A Brave Writer's Life in Brief

Have you noticed wonder recently? It shows up with a spark in your child’s eyes or a glimmer in their smile. And it melts your heart.

You might see it when they catch that first whiff of warm cookies floating their way. Or when they’re reading a book, or watching a movie, or observing wildlife at the birdfeeder. Even while they’re playing a video game!

It happens in a flash, and, before you know it, they’re poring over a new passion.

How can you cultivate that curiosity so learning can take root and sprout?

Spoiler alert

Children are more likely to make meaningful connections when we aren’t marking things off a checklist.

You have the freedom to hold a desired outcome gently and allow skill-building to happen naturally as your learner is immersed in life.

Yes, we are learning. But we are also growing robust human beings.

What a gift. What an honor!

Saying every child loves to learn is a bold statement to believe if the child in front of you actively resists writing. Or math. Or they’re generally disinterested in whatever they deem “schoolish.”

But it’s true. Inside each of us is a natural desire to learn. 

You feel a creative itch and take up quilting. You wake up curious about what happened in the news overnight. You want more beauty in your home so you learn container gardening. And so on.

The same is true for our children. They hunger to learn and enjoy doing it. 

But sometimes that hunger is inadvertently overlooked or stifled.

Joy is lost and our homeschools flounder.

What sucks the joy out of learning?

• Dull, irrelevant tasks 
• Hurried learning
• Too much challenge
• Loss of autonomy

Pause and scan your environment. Is joy happening? Where? What’s causing joy? Who’s engaged and deeply involved? Can you lean into it more?

Rekindle the flame to find the sweet spot that brings joy and skill development together.

Have you ever felt trapped by a group?

You are asking yourself fresh questions, but to voice them to family or friends might mean you are putting yourself at odds with them. The most dangerous thinking happens not because of misinformation but because of the pressure to conform to group think in order to maintain your relationships.

It’s tempting to adopt the beliefs and language of a group in order to feel like you belong. Once you choose to align with a group, however, you may risk your relationships should you ever think differently. But true belonging comes from knowing you can show up as you are now, not as the person you were or are supposed to be.

So, the quickest test of whether someone loves you as you are is to change your mind—to see something in a fundamentally different way than that person you love. How do they see you now?

The Purity Test

I have experienced this—the purity test, the “does she use the right language?” test, the “is it dangerous for me to hang out with her now?” question.

Remember: you don’t owe anyone fidelity to their slogans and ideas. Your strongest relationships are the ones that stay with the you who lives inside your current body, not the ones that are looking for evidence of agreement.

My book, Raising Critical Thinkers, can help too.