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A Brave Writer's Life in Brief

Thoughts from my home to yours

Archive for the ‘Homeschool Advice’ Category

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How to wean your child off your constant presence

http://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photos-vertical-woman-scrubbing-plate-sink-image38709943If you wish your child had more independence, wean your child off your side-by-side presence. Sit with the child for, say, the first three math problems, working them together. Then say, “I need to rinse the breakfast dishes. Keep going. I’ll be right here. If it helps, say aloud what you are doing as you work the problem and I’ll listen. I’ll help you, if you need it, from the sink.”

Some version of that lets the child know you aren’t abandoning him or her, but it also allows a little space for the child to “test” the practice without double checking your facial expressions or asking you to do the work for him/her.

Once the kitchen sink is a safe, reachable distance for your child, try leaving the room for a few moments (to change a load of laundry, to take the mail out to the box, to water a few house plants, to make a bed in another room). Don’t leave to go to a computer screen (you’ll lose track of time). Be gone no more than 3-5 minutes. Then check back and see how the child is doing.

Whenever you leave, rub the shoulders of your child (or gently, affectionately squeeze them or offer a kiss on a cheek or run your hand across the child’s back).

When you return, touch your child’s arm and look over the child’s shoulder. Let the child know you are back and interested in what went on while you were gone.

Avoid judging and correcting. Validate the independent effort. Then ask if the child needs help. If not, keep going in and out of the room in the same manner.

Help your child be indepedent

Image of woman washing dishes by Stephenkirsh | Dreamstime.com

Posted in Brave Writer Philosophy, Homeschool Advice, Parenting | 1 Comment »

It’s that time of year

9 tips for homeschool portfolios and year-end evaluations

You put together a portfolio of the year’s school work and share it with an evaluator of some kind. In Ohio, for instance, we meet with a certified teacher who will vouch for the fact that each child has “gone up a grade level” based on pawing through whatever materials I’ve cobbled together to share with her. In some homes, that “evaluator” turns out to be the other curious parent who would like to know what the heck you’ve been doing all day every day. It may be your anxiety checking in to make sure you didn’t waste an entire year because you were pregnant for half of it.

The year-end gaze back through ten months of education is powerful in aiding you for the next year (I recommend it!) whether or not you need to provide an official portfolio for evaluation by the state representative.

Here are my tips, gleaned from over a decade of that practice.

1. Enjoy year-end evaluations. This is your chance to review your year with your kids. You’ll be surprised to discover that you did a whole lot more than your guilt allowed you to recall in the middle of the night.

2. Be patient as you hunt through the house for evidence that your children got an education. You aren’t only looking for papers with handwriting on them. You might see a framed Van Gogh print on the wall and remember discussing it over breakfast. Grab it. Bring it to the pile of “stuff” (I’ll tell you what to do with it in a minute). The bird feeders in the backyard and the binoculars should join you at the table too. The box of dress up clothes might yield another memory of the kids acting out Colonial USA story-lines from books you read to them in the fall. Page through, scroll through your calendar to remind yourself of field trips (which include going to the movies to see “Frozen,” the walk through the Asian food section of your local market where you picked out the starfruit to try for teatime, the night walk to listen for owls, and the surprise visit to Daddy’s work place). Make a list with dates. Scroll through the iPhoto files as well to remind yourself of activities you are now forgetting. You can print photos and mount them on paper, adding them to the collection of items you will share with your evaluator.

3. Gather the papers too, though. If you aren’t a notebooker (I was for some years, not so much others), you’ll have a collection of the student’s work. You can select samples for the portfolio. Pick pages written in all three seasons (fall, winter, and spring) to show progress. If you don’t have notebooks to help you, the search may require help from the kidlets. Papers get tucked into every corner of the house (under couches, in dresser drawers, in the art room, smashed in the textbook). The goal is to create a representative sample for the evaluator, not an exhaustive (and exhausting) one. 4-5 pages per subject per child is plenty (unless otherwise instructed).

4. Provide a written narrative of the child’s progress in any subject, particularly those without a paper trail. Let’s say that you spent the year learning about art history, but no one journaled about it, no one wrote a little essay about it, no one put on dress up clothes and acted out a painting. How can you show the evaluator that you studied art? Write it up yourself. Narrate what you did, like this: “This past year, we studied art history. Noah, age 9, became fascinated with Paul Klee’s work. We enjoyed these paintings (include titles). Noah’s primary interest in Klee’s work were the whimsical figures. We saw Klee’s paintings several times at these museums. One time Noah said to me, “…….” (You might ask Noah on the spot for a quote, if you can’t remember. Ask naturally, so that he isn’t resistant, “Remember when we studied that painting by Paul Klee that had the X in it? What did you like about it? Do you remember?”).” Your written narrative should take a few paragraphs. Tell it all, in story form.

The written narrative can incorporate all the children, or it can be specific to one child. If a child is working on math, but doing it all with manipulatives and without text books, write about the processes that were mastered and by what tools. The written narrative is also a wonderful way to record the progress of a child that you can use next year for yourself to see how far that child has come (we all have educational amnesia and forget that our kids ever learned a single thing…every year).

Bring a reading list too (books you read to the kids, books the kids read themselves—multiple readings count!). You’ll be amazed at how many words your kids read or heard read in one year. Truly impressive.

5. Bring books, posters, and tools to the evaluation. I used to put everything in a couple of crates and haul it all into Lisa’s living room. Then I’d play show and tell—one child at a time, or sometimes all at once as I covered a subject at a time. I’d pull out the globe and discuss which countries we studied and how. I’d show Lisa our math manipulatives, I’d lay out the calendar that had our bird feeder watch schedule on it and the tallies we made, and I’d put the completed writing projects on the coffee table in a row so she could see how cool they were.

If you bring big stuff and quality projects with you, there will be no need to have volume. You don’t need workbooks filled with words if there is an impressive homemade Egyptian embalming products five page mail order catalog in full color with hand drawn figures and descriptions spiral bound from Staples. Science can be demonstrated through photos of the baking soda volcanoes and the Blood and Guts projects (affiliate link). Do not be seduced by the idea that your year end needs to be demonstrated through paper alone.

6. Going up a grade level is an arbitrary judgment made by the evaluator. Some kids will leap forward in one subject and stagnate (if there is such a thing when growing and learning) in another. Your goal isn’t to convince the evaluator of what you think it means to go up a grade level. Your job is to represent your year. If your kids were active in all the subjects and you can demonstrate investment and a conscientious attitude about learning, the state would have no reason whatsoever to rule that you have failed in your task. If a child is remedial, the only responsibility you have is to show that the child, while not up to grade level in reading or writing or whatever subject, is making progress (in the sense that the child is being given the opportunity to work on that subject with you in a deliberate manner).

7. Find an evaluator who is sympathetic to your style of homeschooling. Some evaluators are known for having an understanding of unschooling, relaxed or eclectic schooling, and some are not. It helps to find an evaluator who homeschools herself or who has been doing it a while. If you go to one that you don’t like, do not ever go back, ever. Find someone else. You do not need the stress of worrying about how that evaluator will think about what you are doing during the year, while you’re doing it. There are plenty of wonderful evaluators who understand homeschooling and aren’t simply looking for a stack of text books from A Beka.

8. Evaluators are skilled in education, usually. Bring your concerns about a child too. Ask for advice on curricula, praxis, and realistic expectations. You’re paying for their expert status—get some bang for your buck!

9. Finally, trust. Trust the process. I came to love year-end evaluations. They gave me a chance to reflect on my year, to appreciate how much my family did together, and to discover which subjects I wanted to address in the coming year in new ways. I also liked having someone approve of me—giving me the “atta girl” that is absent most of the year when your work is largely invisible to everyone else in the entire world.

I have been told by a couple of moms that they do a year-end show-and-tell in their homes for their kids (fabulous idea, I wish I had thought of). Each child collects his or her work and projects and creates a space on a table or in the house to display what they did that year. Yummy treats and delicious drinks are provided. Everyone in the family walks through to appreciate each child’s work. (A great way to include local skeptical grandparents and aunts and uncles too.)

And now your turn. Any advice about end-of-the-year evaluations?

Image by Robert Huffstutter

Posted in Help for High School, Homeschool Advice | 1 Comment »

Make progress: One-thing tips for teens

Image by Andrea D

You feel better when you get stuff done follow-up tips for high school.

Here’s a list of “one things” your teen can do to turn the day around:

Read (anything, everything—websites, books, articles, instructions for how to play…, song lyrics, discussion boards, comic books).

Contribute online to a discussion.

Have a conversation with a sibling.

Solve a problem (math, plumbing, gaming, the wobbly table, the broken blind, detangling a younger sister’s hair, mediate an argument).

Write one poem.

Study one lyric.

Watch one film.

Plan one outing.

Make a plan for next week that gets the teen out of the house.

Go for a run.

Make one date with a friend for coffee and a movie.

Explain one historical event and the persons involved.

Discuss one social issue (both sides).

Identify a theme in one author’s work and talk about it.

Investigate the answer to one question. Report back.

Play one challenging board game.

Study foreign language vocabulary for one hour.

Learn one new scientific principle.

Find one country on the globe that you have never heard of: identify its language, location, political system, and significance on the world stage.

Look up the requirements for one college of the teen’s choice.

Look up the requirements for one career field of interest.

Apply for one job.

Redecorate the teen bedroom.

Work at the most challenging subject matter for one hour.

Learn one new skill—painting walls, quilting, gardening, programming, writing java, cooking or baking…

Start a business. Sell cookies to neighbors, mow lawns, do light housekeeping, tutor math or reading or writing, restring tennis rackets…

Prepare for one section of the SAT/ACT.

Surf, ski, longboard, throw a frisbee, golf, swim, cartwheel, bounce on a trampoline, throw a baseball, hike.

Play one game of chess.

Start a blog or tumblr.

Tweet.

Take one picture and post to Instagram.

Make one to do list… then “to do” it.

You may need to post this list so that the teen has something to look at when boredom inevitably sets in.

Good luck!

Cross-posted on facebook.

Image by Brave Writer mom, Andrea (cc)

Posted in Help for High School, Homeschool Advice, Tips for Teen Writers | Comments Off on Make progress: One-thing tips for teens

You Feel Better When You Get Stuff Done

You Feel Better when You Get Stuff Done

The number one way to improve your homeschool experience is to do it.

Do stuff. Do something every day.

Sometimes your kids will have the best ideas or questions:

  • “Let’s catch tadpoles in the creek!”
  • “I want to write a letter to Aunt Anna in Germany!”
  • “Can we watch Frozen while we eat lunch?”
  • “How much money do I need to save to buy an American Girl doll and how can I get it?”
  • “I want to see the moon through a telescope.”
  • “I can skip count while I jump rope. Wanna see?”

Sometimes you’ll have the best ideas:

  • “Let’s learn measurements by making cupcakes and pies.”
  • “It’s a gorgeous day—let’s take the math books out to a blanket in the backyard.”
  • “I heard the zoo has a discount for kids. Want to go today?”
  • “How about building a fort with these blankets while I read to you from the history book?”
  • “Want to play dress up and act out the Boston Tea Party?”
  • “Let’s call Myra and ask her kids to help us make a Pony Express with bikes.”

Even without inspiration, if you do ONE thing each day, you will make progress and pacify the guilt gremlins.

Here are “ones” that help:

  • Read aloud one chapter.
  • Do one math page.
  • Handwrite one sentence.
  • Paint one picture.
  • Build one Lego set.
  • Eat one healthy meal.
  • Take one neighborhood walk.
  • Identify one bird at the feeder.
  • Make one historical reference.
  • Have one meaningful conversation with one child.

So here’s your chance! Get to it.


The Homeschool Alliance

Posted in Homeschool Advice, One Thing | 2 Comments »

You are the Blueprint

You are the Blueprint

In our eagerness to proudly represent homeschool to the world, we can get distracted by academic achievement as the measure of success. We are told again and again that homeschoolers are smarter than kids educated in traditional school environments. We expect our children to prove that homeschooling works when we get the test scores from the end of the year exams or the SAT/ACT for college.

We might switch from relaxed, eclectic-style homeschool to textbooks or rigorous education models when we hit high school.

Home education is hard work (it takes investment, ongoing self-education about learning and subject matter, stick-to-it-tiveness, and passion).

That said, home education is first and foremost the place where your children have the opportunity to catch the family culture and grow in it.

  • Families who love sports produce kids who excel as athletes.
  • Families who work with their hands produce kids who rip out dry wall and install toilets.
  • Families who care about the disadvantaged produce kids who want to help others.
  • Families who are hospitable and generous to their own families, as well as their neighbors and beyond, will produce kids who are open to others and who freely share their belongings.
  • Families that have a great sense of humor and a penchant for creativity produce silly, artistic kids!
  • Families who think a big vocabulary is a sign of being an adult will raise kids who trade “new” words via text to stump each other (yeah, those would be my kids).

Your children may not grow up to root for your sports team (though it’s likely they will), they may not choose your religion (though it’s likely if you are passionate about your faith, they will have opinions about religion for the rest of their lives), they may not vote how you vote, but if you do vote, they are likely to vote, too, according to their consciences.

Your modeling of what it means to be an adult is the primary way your kids know how to tell themselves that they have arrived: “I’m an adult because…”

  • If you are a risk taking, curious person, your kids are likely to be too.
  • If you read widely and talk about what you discover in books, your kids will too.
  • If you speak a foreign language, your kids will believe it’s possible to learn and speak one.
  • If you travel and show reverence for other cultures, your kids will be fascinated by people different from themselves. They won’t be fearful or judgmental.
  • If you play with math like a toy, your kids will think math is approachable and useful (at least, this is what families good at math tell me! We had the opposite effect on our kids.)

And that’s a good point! What is difficult for you? That’s likely to be challenging to your kids (short of finding them a qualified mentor who can transform how they see that “difficult” subject or character quality). Don’t worry too much. It’s easier to focus on what you are naturally passionate about and good at. That’s what your kids will see and value anyway.

You shape who your kids become. Think about the affinities and skills you exude, live, naturally express. Your kids are going to look like you. Start valuing what you’re good at, because like it or not, some measure of that legacy will be indelibly stamped on your kids as adults.

Like this:

If you quilt, teach not just your girls, but your boys too! If you woodwork, show both boys and girls how to build a bookcase.

Everyone should know how to cook nutritious, tasty meals for themselves from the “recipe book of your family’s nightly dinners.” Comfort food. Home.

Your dinner time conversations will tell your kids what you value the most. They will get the meta-lesson: this is what it is to be a grown up.

  • Do you want your kids to think adulthood means “ripping” the politicians you don’t like on an endless loop?
  • Do you want them to think that education is just something to be “done” rather than a life to be lived well beyond school?
  • Do you want them to believe that money is the most important part of a career choice?
  • Do you want them to hand-wring over success and failure, or to enjoy the exploration of life with you at their sides?

How you live as a family will have more to do with who your kids become than any curriculum you purchase.

What’s so amazing is that if you keep an open-hand, if you don’t “prophesy doom” or overly script what the one-right future should be, your children will grow up to be even better adults than you and your partner. They have you, these intentional, caring, invested role models sharing their best stuff with them.

This is the best education possible! One that goes well beyond book lists and math skills.

When they get to college or their chosen career field, you will see the fruits of all those conversations and tasks you shared. They will look like you, as surely as their red hair and freckles. But a fresher, vibrant, optimistic version.

You’ll be so proud. The blueprint—turned into the finished (finishing) product of young adult.

The Homeschool Alliance

Image by Jessie Pearl (cc cropped, text added)

Posted in Homeschool Advice, Parenting | Comments Off on You are the Blueprint

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