[Podcast #346] Part One: ADHD and Homeschooling
Join us for today’s Brave Writer podcast episode!
In this honest and eye-opening conversation, we explore what happens when the home educator begins to recognize ADHD traits in themselves. From task initiation and time blindness to hyperfocus, novelty, shame, doom boxes, and the relief of a diagnosis, we talk about how our wiring shapes the homeschool experience.
We also name the gifts:
- enthusiasm,
- curiosity,
- side quests,
- deep dives,
- and the ability to turn education itself into a living adventure.
Tune in for Part One of a conversation many of us didn’t know we needed.
Show Notes
What If the Home Educator Has ADHD?
We spend a lot of time talking about how to support neurodivergent children. We look for the right strategies, the right accommodations, the right rhythm, the right language. We read the books. We consult the experts. We adjust the environment.
But what happens when we begin to recognize that some of those same traits live in us?
Many homeschooling parents are exquisitely attentive to their children’s needs while remaining strangely unaware of their own wiring. We notice the child who needs movement, fewer transitions, more time, less pressure, or a different path into learning. Meanwhile, we are the ones losing track of appointments, switching curriculum because the new thing feels alive, creating elaborate planner systems, avoiding the calendar because it triggers shame, or wondering why a simple task feels separated from us by an invisible wall.
That wall has a name for many people: task initiation.
Task initiation is not laziness. It is the experience of knowing what needs doing and still struggling to begin. The laundry is there. The email is there. The homeschool plan is there. Even the enjoyable activity is there. And yet, beginning can feel impossible until pressure, novelty, accountability, or hyperfocus finally kicks in.
For some of us, homeschooling works beautifully because it feeds the very traits we once thought were liabilities. Curiosity? That’s a homeschool superpower. Hyperfocus? Welcome to the deep dive. Love of novelty? Every library stack, unit study, poetry teatime, science experiment, rabbit trail, and historical obsession benefits from a parent who can become fascinated on demand.
The ADHD-style brain can bring enormous energy to home education. It can turn a child’s passing interest into a full-family immersion. It can learn alongside the child with sincerity. It can say yes to side quests. It can transform education from a checklist into a feast.
And it can also create stress.
A parent who loves novelty may change course too often. A parent who resists schedules may have a child who longs for one. A parent who underestimates time may turn every departure into a crisis. A parent who avoids the calendar may miss the appointment, double-book the day, or live under a cloud of dread.
This is where self-knowledge becomes a gift to the whole family.
We do not need shame to become better supported. We need information. A diagnosis, a pattern, a vocabulary word, or even a moment of recognition can help us stop moralizing our struggles and start building meaningful strategies.
Maybe that means alarms on the calendar. Maybe it means protected days when nothing gets scheduled. Maybe it means routines instead of rigid schedules. Maybe it means keeping snacks, water, and backup clothes in the car because “prepared” does not come naturally. Maybe it means apologizing when our wiring creates stress for someone else.
Homeschooling is not built by perfect parents.
It is built by human parents who keep learning.
When we understand our own brains, we are better able to create homes where everyone’s needs matter: the child who craves structure, the child who needs freedom, the parent who comes alive through novelty, and the family system that needs enough steadiness to hold it all.
The goal is not to become someone else. The goal is to know who we are well enough to build supports that let love, learning, and connection flourish.
Resources
- DIVA questionnaire for ADHD: advancedassessments.co.uk
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Produced by NOVA
The Third Way
Have you ever been confounded by the way your child or teen sees the world? You have this clear idea: eat your meals, do your schoolwork, save play for once your responsibilities are complete.
Your kids, on the other hand, simply don’t.
What do you do then?
There’s one school of thought that says kids owe their parents obedience—that they don’t have to like what the parent wants for them, they simply have to do it and learn to agree with it eventually.
There’s another school of thought that says parents shouldn’t force their children to do anything they don’t want to do. Keep your hands off and trust the child.
Did you know there’s a third way? It’s the one I write the most about. It’s possible to both have values and goals for your child while also honoring the unique perspective and needs of your offspring. In fact, this negotiation between what a child values and what you care about is the stuff of parenting. There’s no straight line or easy practice that accomplishes this delicate balance.
Rather, the only path forward in parenting is keeping your attention on having a responsive, warm relationship with your child. You know what that means to your kid? They feel connected when they feel:
- seen,
- heard,
- and known.
They trust you when they can tell you have not just their best interests at heart, but care about the interests they’ve chosen for themselves.
How does this apply to getting math homework done? Take your child seriously. Listen to the resistance or anxiety. Support your child in achieving the task by being that responsive, kind parent who makes facing math less daunting or worrying or upsetting.
Your child will teach you what they need if you have the ears to hear!
Brave Writer Coaching in Action: Writing a Greek Myth
We know that young writers often feel vulnerable when sharing their work, even in our friendly online classroom. Red pen effect is real!
So we thought we’d give you a glimpse of what an actual student-coach interaction looks like in our beloved Writing a Greek Myth class.
In this assignment, students were asked to write about two Greek gods in conflict.
A student posted*…
One time, the mischievious god of thieves bounces up the rocky slopes of Delphi. Soon, he saw the radiant glow of his favorite brother, Apollo, god of Archery. He shouted “HI, APOLLO!” Apollo was so shocked he tried to draw his bow only to find he did not have it. “Hermes!” He grew 99,999,999,999 miles tall. Hermes responded to this by…shooting him on the bottom! They chased each other around until Hermes gave the bow back and bounded down the hill with his lyre.
What happens next? Students receive constructive, supportive feedback to help them grow as writers. Rather than breaking out the red pen for spelling and punctuation errors, our coaches dig deeper to notice what works in the writing, to name it, and to offer expansion ideas. Coaches offer in-line responses, so commentary feels like a conversation between writer and reader.
See that in action
One time, the mischievious god of thieves bounces up the rocky slopes of Delphi.
The pairing of the verb bounce with the adjective mischievous works well—I can picture the carefree, impish way the god moves.
Soon, he saw the radiant glow of his favorite brother, Apollo, god of Archery.
You work in some physical characteristics (radiant glow) while keeping the action going. It builds my mental image while I continue to follow along with the god.
He shouted “HI, APOLLO!” Apollo was so shocked he tried to draw his bow only to find he did not have it.
Your use of all caps helps me hear the shout (and see why Apollo was shocked).
If you like the idea, you could even play up his shock for us—where does he look? What expression crosses his face when he realizes what Hermes has done? I’d love to be a fly “on the wall” here!
“Hermes!” He grew 99,999,999,999 miles tall.
This very specific number grows in my mind as I read—all those ‘9s’ make Apollo seem even taller.
I’d love to see this happening! I imagine birds taking flight and tree branches breaking off as Apollo shoots past them. This might be a fun place to zoom in if you ever return to this story.
Hermes responded to this by…shooting him on the bottom!
Ha! That’s a response in line with this mischievous god. Plus, it has me imagining the earth-shattering roar that might result!
They chased each other around until Hermes gave the bow back and bounded down the hill with his lyre.
You worked each character’s special objects into your myth and got their personalities across in a way that would help me get to know them, even if I hadn’t read the original myths. Thanks for sharing!
*used with permission
After the feedback
Students can run with the ideas the coach offered or just file them away for later. In the meantime, they get to feel like real writers—authors who make an impact on their readers. That’s powerful stuff!
