Do you ever wonder what to do when your child has a meltdown about homeschooling? I have a video message for you!
I made a reel on request from a morning chat I did on Instagram. Reels are not my favorite but it’s nice to give this one a permanent spot!
Need more support?
Listen to the Brave Writer podcast. Literally, I talk about this stuff there every single week!
You might also read my book, The Brave Learner.
I’m here for you!
Take it from me: you can’t really change your child.
What you can do is help them learn how to adapt to a world that isn’t designed for the kind of person they are. Fundamentally, “Who We Are” stays pretty much the same throughout our lives. What we learn to do is cope.
Your job as a parent is to be the chief instructor of coping skills not the chief changer of personalities.
If you can’t figure out how to do it, your kids will teach you. Stay open to the lesson.
Love them for who they are. Help them adapt while protecting their original quirkiness!
Teens intimidate us.
Even when their interests seem dumb or uninteresting to us, following a teen’s passions or interests or curiosity will lead to learning. Teens need to know that the stuff they love has value for the adult lives they will eventually get to lead!
Our job is to show them that the adulthood waiting for them is more interesting than merely paying bills and doing housework faithfully. Trust the process!
Take a teen interest that unnerves you and find the value in it.
Watch my Instagram reel to learn more.
Also my book RAISING CRITICAL THINKERS can help!
Are you having a bad day? What do you like to hear the most when things are going poorly?
There’s an old saying: “What we resist persists.”
When you’re having a bad day, isn’t the last thing you want to hear is that you should be grateful for what a great life you have and that sometimes you have responsibilities and just need to do them?
I know I always feel so much better when someone simply starts by accepting my own self reporting. “I believe you” is a powerful three word phrase.
Try it today when your child tells you they don’t like the turkey sandwich that they’ve always loved. Try it when one of your children says they hate taking baths even though yesterday they loved taking baths. Try it when they tell you math is too hard or writing hurts their hand.
Say: “I believe you.”
Some might ask, but what does it mean to say “I believe you” to a kid you know is lying? Doesn’t that encourage your child to make up stories rather than tell the truth? Good question! Watch my follow up video response where I explain more what I mean by using the phrase “I believe you” as a tool to create connection and build trust.
So leave some space to see what comes next. You might be surprised where it leads.
This post is originally from Instagram and @juliebravewriter is my account there so come follow along for more conversations like this one!
Our students need to believe that they can rely on parents and teachers who will stand by them, not abandon them—even when we find their reasoning incomplete.
The tough part about raising teens is that they test a belief system that sometimes feels illogical or dangerous to you.
Teens deserve parents who are capable of holding space for their developing brains. Don’t worry. The things you thought you knew so confidently at 15 underwent revision in your 20s and 30s and 40s. Ideas can grow and change when we feel free to think, rather than defend.
What you don’t want to lose is connection between parent and child. Your kids are good. They’re your beautiful children. They are playing with ideas the same way they played with Melissa and Doug toys. You can do it!
Connection is everything.
—exceprt from Julie’s book RAISING CRITICAL THINKERS
